With my wedding over, and summer at its peak, it’s time for some reflection.
A little over 18 months ago I was the sickest I had ever been in my life. I had lost close to 20lbs (I’m skinny AF as is so this was really not good). My family was going through some turmoil due to a death in the family. I had no idea where my career was going. Worse than all of that, I was constantly arguing and fighting with the girl of my dreams. I did not know it then, but I was fucking depressed. For all the naturally positive people out there who can relate to me, you’ll understand when I say I had no clue what that feeling was. Feelings are not something I am particularly good at dealing with or communicating. Since then I have worked on that part of myself, and looking back it was crystal clear.
I had this itch to want something bigger for my life. Yet, I was left wondering if I would ever get better, would I find a path I enjoy, and whether or not Erin would continue to stand by my side because I was so all over the place. On the outside it looked like I knew exactly what I was doing, but on the inside I was completely lost. For anyone who understands this, I empathize with you.
While my stubbornness has caused issues in the past, it is/was my saving grace. I refused to give up. With never give up tattooed on my side I really don’t have a choice. So on January 1st 2017 I quit my job. No clear path, no clear plan, other than an Engineering degree, a personal training certificate, and this voice in my head saying CJ you’ve worked extremely hard your entire life to earn this opportunity...don’t fuck it up. I had never written a business plan, started an LLC or Corp, raised and received capital, completed a trademark/patent...and the massive amount of other, more important factors it takes to start, operate, and sustain a business.
To be 100 percent honest, I had no clue what I was doing but I accepted projects, jobs, work I did not know how to do. Thanks Google, Barnes and Noble and countless trial and errors for helping me figure it out.
Guess what world...I can say I’ve attempted and accomplished all of those, while being only on a minor scale, everything starts somewhere!
While there’s a lot more to the story. I’d rather jump to the happiest I’ve ever been in my life. Right now. I want to finish this post about how quickly things can change for the better. In actuality, when I look back, things weren’t really that bad after all. Yes I was sick, yes I was stressed, yes I had no clue what I was doing. The important thing to realize though, I had the freedom not only to feel all that, but to be able to change it.
One of the biggest reasons I was able to make steps towards this point was all the people I am fortunate to know and be surrounded by. You all have impacted my life in ways I could never repay you for. I’m making a promise to do whatever it takes to continue to help people who were/are less fortunate than me. Consider it a pay it forward plan. I have never felt more alive and in tune with my direction. I would love to help others find their’s!
To THRIVE this week I ask you to never doubt your capabilities even when the light seems to be the dimmest. Never judge a book (person) by their cover because you have no clue what they are going through. To lend a helping hand to someone in need, because if we win as a team, we will WIN AS INDIVIDUALS.